Completely Done or A New Me

Before I start the real content, as always, here's some pre-content. This is in response to my parking places. Yesterday night, like every Monday night, I had dance class at Ramsey. Now, Ramsey is twice as far away as Snelling. I take the elevator down to my car and as soon as I see my car from the elevator window I immediately think, "Fuck that!" and proceed to return to ground level and walk to Ramsey. I am NOT giving up that parking spot! Ever! I conveniently left 20 minutes earlier than normal so I just figured I'd walk instead of wait for a bus. I got about half way to Snelling, in the O House area, and I see Caleb's car at the red light so I walk up to it and he thankfully gives me a ride. I ended up arriving 10 - 15 minutes early but whatevs. I still have a kick ass parking spot. Thankfully I have friends in the class who can drive me back to Creswell because right when I call Paul, who lives in ECV right next to Ramsey, to drive me back, my phone dies... Oh well. Upon returning to Creswell, I baked cookies for Caleb because he failed his lab practical because the machine broke. My cookies are pretty amazing. Now real content.

I honestly think I'm done with guys. Done with hook-ups. Done with sex. Done with everything until I find the right person. There will be no more going over to someone's place when I feel as if something may happen. I thought I had turned over a new leaf on Easter but apparently the wind blew it a little. That leaf is permanently stationary now. I think I may just try girls now. Not try them as if they're some kind of tool or new dessert but actually date and form a relationship with one. Guys just aren't working (for anyone apparently). I've already talked to Sarah V. about it and have received her opinions on the matter and I plan on discussing this with several others.

On to a different note, same book different page, I can't believe I've lied about my sexual history. I guess being a virgin is more appealing to me and I would rather lie about it than tell people who don't care about the truth. As of last night, I guess I've technically had sex four times. I honestly feel as if I'm ashamed of my lifestyle. I really don't know what's wrong with me. I always thought I was such a better person. But, as I've been telling people a lot lately, everything happens for a reason. It is time for yet another new, but more permanent, Barrett.